deep deep trouble

Iapos;ve been gone a long time, though I doubt anybody noticed.

Last week I had two substantial binges; the first being ice cream and the second costco food and margaritas. I havenapos;t thought about my ED in a long time. I have not fasted, counted calories, purged, nothinapos;. I�have totally ignored the fact Iapos;m at my most heavy. Ever. I figured I was still wearing small sizes, so whatever, right? Iapos;m cured

Then the binges. And with no thought or plan I take a trip to the bathroom both nights to relieve my bladder. It occurs without thought. The rolling and churning in my belly somehow speaks to my brain. And I purge. Two nights in a row. Leaving myself aching in bed for more food.

It was the most pleased with myself than Iapos;ve been in months.� And I have no idea how to feel about it.
deep deep trouble, deep deep thoughts, deep deep simpsons trouble, deep deep purple rapture.